Finding true, soulful love is not a destination, its a journey. A real and lasting relationship with a spiritual soul mate requires inner work and outer preparation. But what is a "soul mate" really? What does the term mean in an age of online dating and a fast-paced life? Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway, an interfaith minister and relationships counselor, asked the members of her vibrant Beliefnet group "The Soul Mate Project" to define the term. The 8 definitions that follow reveal the true depth and complexity of love, as well as its simple beauty.
Soul Mates Complement Each Other
You don't have to agree on politics, but you better have compatible ideas on the nature of G-d (even if you practice different religions). You don't have to like the same comedians, but you have to understand each other's humor.You may give to different charities, but you have to share a generosity of spirit.One can be Felix and one can be Oscar, but you both better be on the same page when it comes to running the household moneywise.The man doesn't have to be Brad Pitt and the woman doesn't have to be Angelina Jolie, but the man needs to see his soulmate as HIS Angelina Jolie and the woman needs to see her soulmate as HER Brad Pitt.Most of all, you have to feel a connection -- a connection so strong that you say, "This may be the most remarkable person I have ever met in my life." Where you look forward just as much to conversations and activities out of bed as the other way around (although you want both).And where it's a connection that defies time -- that you know you may raise a family together and will definitely grow old together, and the prospect excites you rather than scares you.
Soul Mates Come from God
God is my soul mate. God plays the music and calls the dances. I'm dancing to God's tune. I can feel God's rhythm in my feet and the way the bass line resonates in my core. Now, I have a dance card. Right now, I can't read the names, but I have one. God filled it out with men who would make good parteners for me. If a dancer who is not listed tries to dance with me, we won't dance well because we are not suited. The men on the card will do well because God thinks that we would do well. Not that we would be flashy, but that we would enjoy dancing together. We would make that joyful noise.
Soul Mates Have a Different Kind of Love
I believe a soul mate is not necessarily a love interest. A soulmate is someone that will mirror you, show you everything that is holding you back...a person who will bring you to your own attention so you can change your life.A true soul mate is probably the most important person you will ever meet. They will come into your life to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave.
Soul Mates Navigate Differences
I think that if soulmates exist, and I am not convinced they do or rather they do for everyone, BUT assuming they do, I think soulmates can navigate differences. It isn't the least bit important that they agree on anything but that they can still love, respect, and yes, even appreciate the differences of each other. I have dated a guy that was too much like me. There were advantages of that relationship but what I learned is that even though we were so much alike, we still could not navigate the very few, slight differences we had. I have come to the conclusion that differences never matter, it is what you do with those differences that matters. It is the differences of other people that cause us to grow. Differences also smooth out the edges on our own personalities. A good relationship changes people for the better or rather facilitates an evolution that is both spiritual and personality wise. It is the whole grain of sand/pearl thing.
Soul Mates Complete Each Other
My definition: Entering friendships/relationships for what one can put into them instead of what can be gained from them. NOT to find another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share completeness.
Soul Mates Feel Like 'Home'
I see it as a connection that defies explanation. Where you can look at each other and no words need to be exchanged. I am currently in a relationship with my soul mate. There is no other feeling like it. The connection is physical, emotional, spiritual, and any other "al" that is possible. It just feels like "home". And I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.
Soul Mates Are Cosmically Connected
I just want to tell you about my soul mate, who has passed on. I understand what this one song means when it says "I miss you, like the deserts miss the rains." I knew her since I was 5 and she was 7. We knew we had some connection even then. We said it was like electricity inside us when we were together. Once when we had been away from each other for some time there was this dance for alumni. I was just standing watching everyone dance, and I suddenly had the warmest most wonderful feeling come over me. We both turned around at the same time and saw each other. She said she had the same feeling. It always seemed to be like that.Ever had a puzzle of a picture of a most wonderful place in the world, and there was one piece missing? That puzzle isn't complete without it. When she died of cancer, her last words to me were "I'll come and find you, I'll come get you when you get to Heaven." Others may have more than one, but I know who and where my soul mate is.
Soul Mates Learn from Each Other
My soul mate is someone who walks beside me not in front, because I may not follow. He's someone who listens when I speak and speaks while I listen. He supports me physically, emotionally, spiritually, and financially if I let him. He doesn't have to agree with me but be on my side (watch my back while I watch his). Someone who doesn't execute authority over me, because only my Creator has that right, but someone who accepts me as the person I am. I was created in the Creator's image, not anyone else's. My soul mate knows this and accepts it, he walks a mile in my moccasins, then we discuss what has been learned.