By Jeff Hooten
If you've ever watched TV, read a magazine or surfed the Net — and who hasn't? — it's easy to believe that the entire population has surrendered to their hormones. And while it's true that premarital sex remains the norm in society today, there is a new trend making its way across the land.
It's the New Virginity, and it's not just for teens anymore.
It began in the 1990s, as young people began to ask the question: "Why Wait?" Some decided to abstain from sex for religious reasons, others to avoid the risk of sexually transmitted diseases. Still others realized they weren't ready for the intense intimacy of a sexual relationship.
Those same teenagers are adults now, and many of them are still waiting. And they've been joined in their quest for purity by a growing mass of adults who were once sexually active, but no more. It's a phenomenon known as "secondary virginity," and its practitioners have experienced sexual relationships and found them wanting. They're looking for love and respect — the kind that lasts a lifetime — and they're willing to wait for it, even if it means losing out on a potential mate who doesn't share their convictions.
These "born-again virgins" can't change the past, but they're committed to creating a better future. Contrary to pop-culture wisdom, those who do choose to save sex for marriage are not doomed to a second-class sex life. Rather, they typically report higher levels of sexual satisfaction and marital contentment. Moreover, early sexual experience has been linked to marital dissatisfaction, low self-esteem and greater incidence of divorce.
Indeed, why not wait?
Copyright © 2002 Focus on the Family.